


Storm Inside

by LittleSammy



Category: due South
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-03
Updated: 2010-04-03
Packaged: 2017-10-08 16:44:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/77590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSammy/pseuds/LittleSammy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ray wants Fraser to let go for once. Which leads to something unexpected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Storm Inside

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Not mine. Just played with them. Put 'em back unharmed.
> 
> This is set directly after the episode 'Bounty Hunter' - or, more precisely, after the dinner that Ray promised to buy Fraser.

"No?!" Ray Kowalski suddenly stopped dead in his tracks right in the middle of the street as well as the middle of their conversation, staring at his friend's back, and it actually took his companion a few more steps to realize that Ray was no longer at his side. "What do you mean, no?!" he repeated.

Fraser turned to look back at Ray, who met his gaze with an expression of stunned amazement. "I meant it in the most common use of the word, which would be - as I believe - the opposite of 'yes'." the Mountie quipped quietly, a slow smile curving his mouth. Then he turned and resumed his path, walking down the dimly lit street that would eventually lead them to the Canadian consulate. After a few steps he heard Ray sigh and give in, following him quickly. When the cop walked by his side once again, he had one of his hands buried deep in his jeans pockets while the other drew confused circles in the air.

"I don't believe this. You didn't even *kiss* her?" he asked again, still baffled, just to be on the safe side.

"Actually, I *did* kiss her good-bye, but as it played out, that was more like a sign of friendly affection..." He heard Ray's disbelieving snort and turned his head to stare at him, a frown narrowing his dark blue eyes. "And aside from that, I still think this is none of your business."

"And *I* still think it is. Look, Fraser..." he continued before his partner could object. "It's just, y'know, this, well, puzzles me. I mean, I've seen how good you two got along. You had a lot in common, and there was *definitely* some heavy attraction thing going on between you and this Janet. And since you're not a monk, just a Mountie..."

A deep sigh interrupted him. "You know, Ray - some people would try to hurt you for this statement."

"Yeah, well, lucky me, you're not one of them." Ray shrugged, still eyeing Fraser carefully, curiously. His partner didn't respond, and so Ray kept quiet, waiting for Fraser to finally spill his guts.

Well, he tried to. But since Ray Kowalski had never been a very patient man, the silence lasted for about five seconds before he took a deep breath, running a hand across his face in an exasperated gesture. "Okay, so let me get this straight - nothing happened when she spent the night at the consulate? Nothing even remotely smoochy?"

"No." Fraser confirmed quietly, tilting his head back until he could look up into the nightly sky. "But it was very... tempting." he sighed then, and when Ray looked at him this time he was surprised to see a strange emotion play on his friend's face, just a glimpse of something that seemed to be an almost painful longing. Something that was gone as fast as it had appeared.

Okay, so why did this hurt? Why the hell did the sight of Fraser with this strange need written across his face suddenly make him want to... want to what?

"Damn, Fraser." he muttered, shaking his head. "How do you do that?"

"How do I do what?"

"Stay focused. Resist. Fight the urges down. Whatever you want to call it. It's not *healthy*." He shook his head again, raising a hand to stop Fraser from interrupting him and crossing his train of thought. "No, wait, that didn't sound how I meant it."

"Okay, then - how *did* you mean it?"

The eyes that met his showed mild amusement, and Ray frowned, not quite sure how to take this, just like he never was quite sure how to take the things Fraser said or did. He opened his mouth to answer the question, closed it again when he didn't find the right words. Staring at Fraser, he shook his head suddenly. "Don't you ever lose control?"

"No. I try not to." The slight smile on Fraser's face vanished, replaced by a somewhat polite expression, and Ray felt like he had just watched him put on a mask. A mask that may have still looked like Fraser, but wasn't the real thing. Ray's brows drew together in an even darker frown as he suddenly remembered a lot of times when he had seen Fraser look like this, with a friendly and slightly blank expression, and it made him wonder why he had never realized that it was just a clever guise, a cover-up while he tried to hold a rigid reign on his emotions. To his amazement he found that he didn't like it at all.

"Don't do that, Fraser." he growled angrily. "Don't clam up on me like that."

"Ray..." The name was just a soft-spoken word, a prelude to a more lengthy explanation, and as he watched Fraser sigh and shake his head, he knew the Mountie was about to deny it, of course. And for some reason that pissed him off. Thoroughly.

"Don't 'Ray' me, Fraser. And don't clam up on me, I mean it." he repeated, stepping into the taller man's way and blocking his path until Fraser had to stop, had to meet his gaze. The look in those dark blue eyes got under his skin and made him shiver, but he stood his ground and didn't back away because by now he was way too angry for that. "We're partners, Fraser. We're... you called me your friend, remember that?" He fell silent, watching Fraser intently until the dark-haired man blinked, once, twice. Then the Mountie nodded slowly, and Ray returned the gesture, tilting his head slightly in satisfaction. "Well, friends share, friends talk. *I* talk to you, Fraser, all the time I talk to a guy I didn't even know two months ago, and I already feel like I've spilled my guts about every useless piece of shit that gets my knickers in a knot, but you, you don't talk, not to me, not about the important stuff. You just hide behind this damn polite face of yours. It's not human, Fraser, and it's not even Canadian. You're not perfect, so stop acting like you are!"

The angry words trailed off, and for a few long moments they just stared at each other, Ray still angry, and mad, and annoyed for whatever strange reason, and Fraser... Fraser still meeting his gaze with a storm brewing inside him. A storm that would never do more than merely ripple the surface, never truly disrupt the dark depths of sea blue eyes.

Then Fraser lowered those eyes, looking away, and he raised a hand to run it through his dark hair as he began to speak. "Ray, I'm sorry if I..."

He cut him short. It was almost like a reflex. He couldn't help it, he just threw the angry words at his partner before Fraser could go on, before he could apologize and say something to ruin Ray's carefully bottled up annoyance. "Don't, Fraser. Stop it right there. I don't want that. I don't want an excuse, I don't want a logical explanation, and I most definitely don't want one of your Inuit stories that's going to beat sense into all of this." His hands moved in quick, angry gestures, and he tried to keep his voice down, tried to stay calm, but it didn't work 'cause it never worked with Fraser, 'cause the damn Canadian just had a special way of getting under his skin and frizzing him up like a deaf wolf on a bad hair day.

And instead of doing what Ray would have somehow expected of him and asking what it was he wanted, Fraser just frowned at him now, silent, puzzled, staring at Ray and scrutinizing him until the cop took another step towards his partner. "What I *want*", he muttered into his friend's face, pressing the words through gritted teeth, "is you talking to me, really talking, just this once, okay? Just this one time tell me what's really on your mind, not just what you want me to see. Tell me about Janet. Tell me you want her. Tell me you'd like to fuck her senseless. Or tell me you don't. But just this once tell me how you *feel*, dammit!"

His voice rose with each word, and as he stood there, panting, his hands clenched into fists, muscles tense, he held Fraser's gaze. Then, for just a moment he saw something deep flicker in those eyes, and it felt like he'd do it, like he'd just open his mouth and start talking to him. But then, of course, the mask of control was suddenly back in place, and Fraser took a step back, out of his reach. Shaking his head again.

"You don't want that."

He was damn close to giving in, close to accepting Fraser's choice, like he had accepted almost every damn thing his partner did, but then his anger took over, white-hot anger that was directed at himself, for not being able to stay in control of this just once, and anger directed at Fraser for... for showing him. For giving him a mere glimpse of so much more that was hidden underneath his calm exterior, and for shutting him out, and not giving him the rest of it, and goddammit, he wanted *more*!

"Yes, I *do*!" he hissed, moving towards Fraser again, invading his personal space, crawling up to him and raising his hands to push them flat against the other man's chest, pushing him, not back, but into action. "I *want* you to spill your guts, and I *want* to know what's going on in this weird brain of yours!" Another push, more firmly this time, and Ray felt muscles tense under his fingers as Fraser refused to back up further and tried to resist his shoving, tried to stand his ground. "*Show* me, Fraser, show me what makes you tick, just this once, come on! I know there's more, and I know you don't want to let it out, but I've seen it all, and I've seen worse, and I can take it, I swear, I just want you to show me you're still *human* in there, and I want you to lose control just this fuckin' *once*, goddammit!" he cursed, and he knew he was shouting, and he didn't care at all, as long as he finally got a reaction, *any* reaction, out of Fraser.

He stared at him wide-eyed, panting, so close they almost touched, and then Fraser suddenly nodded, tilting his head to the side in a strange little gesture, but before he could think about what it meant, Ray felt him lean forward and grab him by the collar of his leather jacket. Strong arms yanked him up and to the side, slamming him into the fence to his right, but not letting go as he groaned at the hard impact. His own hands came up to wrap around Fraser's wrists out of reflex, scrabbling at the hands that pressed him hard into the mesh wire. His eyes widened even more when he found he couldn't move the massive body that pressed against his and held him trapped, not even an inch, and when he gasped for air, he felt Fraser tighten his grip, refusing to let go.

"This", he huffed into Ray's face, his voice so low the cop could feel the vibration against his skin, "is when I lose control, Ray."

Ray met his stare as if it were a duel of some sort, a battle of will and determination between them. His hands still held Fraser's wrists in a tight grip, and his fingers wrapped around the tense flesh, around the rapidly beating pulse. He felt the heat radiating from his partner, seeping into his skin where they touched, and it felt so fuckin' good to be so close to him, but all he could think of was that Fraser would expect him to back off now because he'd seen more than he could handle. And he couldn't do that.

So he raised his chin defiantly, his mouth curving into something that might have become a challenge, but before he could even think of a sarcastic remark, he saw Fraser's eyes narrow in a frown. And suddenly he felt him surge forward, felt the hard body press into his, and then Fraser's lips were on his own, and Fraser's tongue was pushing into his mouth, and Ray gasped in surprise at the unexpected sensation.

His hands clenched around Fraser's wrists hard, hard enough to leave bruises, but there wasn't enough force in his movements to push the larger man away because now he suddenly found himself responding, found himself drowning in the kiss he returned ferociously, groaning, sucking, biting, tasting that hot mouth for all it was worth.

Hands held him hard and pressed his body into the mesh wire. A hard-muscled leg slid between his thighs, and he couldn't help but respond, couldn't help but moan into Fraser's mouth as he gave in, riding out the storm he had evoked, kissing, licking, his body moving involuntarily against the man who held him captive... who kissed him so hard he could hardly breathe... who pushed his tongue into his mouth so deep it felt like he was being fucked...

And then, just as suddenly as it had begun, it was over, and he was trembling like mad, his hands gripping the mesh wire as he watched Fraser step back hard and run a hand through his hair, his muscles tense, his whole body rigid. All masks back in place, and to all the world he looked as if nothing out of the ordinary had ever happened between them. And for some weird reason that made Ray's throat tighten painfully, worse than anything Fraser could have said right then.

The anger rose again, pulsing through him, taking the place of whatever it was that had possessed him mere moments ago. "What the hell *was* that, Fraser?!" he shouted as he pushed himself away from the fence, surprised to find his muscles actually working.

For a long moment the other man remained silent, his head turned to the side as if he were carefully avoiding to look at him, and that made Ray feel like punching him, right now, right in the gut, and it was so damn hard to fight the urge down.

Then Fraser shook his head, just a slight movement, and a muscle jumped in the Mountie's cheek as he tried to relax his clenched jaw. "I was losing control." he explained quietly, staring down at his own hands. "If I remember correctly, that was exactly what you asked for."

"Well, I wasn't expecting *that*!" The words were out before he could stop them, and Fraser laughed then, a short, rough sound that made the hair at the back of Ray's neck stand on edge.

"Funny." the Mountie murmured, the corners of his mouth tilting up into a strange smile that didn't quite reach his sea blue eyes. "That makes two of us." He turned then to pick up the Stetson he had lost somewhere along the way.

As Fraser moved quietly along the dark street, he felt Ray's gaze on him, heavy, questioning. Then, after moments that stretched almost painfully, he heard the footsteps, slow at first, but quickly catching up with him. Then Ray was beside him again, sharing his company quietly and, for a change, not arguing with him.

And in the silence of the night and the darkness of the street and the warm presence of his companion beside him, the Canadian smiled.


End file.
